It’s been a while since I last wrote a proper entry here. A lot to cope up with – recuperating, trying to establish a routine, handling a newborn and three toddlers etc. It’s overwhelming sometimes if not most of the time honestly, but I’m doing good nonetheless.

Baby Muiz is 34 days old today, Alhamdulillah. How time flies. That means I only have 26 days left before going back to work. I am freaking out. I am soooo not ready. So much so that there are days I wish I have the guts to just quit my job and be a stay-at-home-mom. Half of the time I think I even manage to convince myself that I should just do it, that if my ‘niat’ is right, all will go well in the end but the other half of the time, I am not so sure. I know eventually it will happen, but I’m not too sure if now is the time.

Oh well…

Afiq, Mariessa and Adreena are adjusting well, Alhamdulillah. Afiq is definitely happy to have another boy in the house and can’t wait for Muiz to grow up so they can play together. (I guess he’s tired playing with girls.. haha. Asyik kena mengalahhhhhh je) Mariessa is happy being a 2nd mother to Muiz, fussing over him. Adreena… well… other than hiding behind the sofa everytime “Muiz beyak”, she’s doing great! She calls him “Muish-tudin”, sometimes “baby boy”, but last night when Muiz cried, she shouted “Mama… cepat sini.. budak ni nangis!”. Tak tau la daripada mana dia dengar ‘budak’ tu. :P

7 years ago, I struggled to breastfeed Afiq (largely due to my ignorance – I thot it would come naturally, so I didn’t read much about it prior) and I miserably failed. So this is more or less like the first time for me breastfeeding a boy. Oh boy, the difference! Muiz can’t seem to get enough of milk, and it’s not because the supply is low I assure you that! With 26 days to go, I now only have one bottle of EBM stock in the freezer and I honestly don’t know if I can get as much stock prepared as I had done with Mariessa and Adreena. We’ll see how it goes. I am determined not to let this worry me too much – no use worrying over this anyway, it will only affect the supply if not anything else. :)

( As I was writing this, Adreena came to me and said..”Mama.. kenapa ni monyok monyok ni?” Hahahah.. Ada2 je budak ni!).

Muiz will wake up soon for his feed, I think. So I should just publish this before it becomes another draft. :). Have a lot more to write about, if and when the time permits InsyaAllah. Until then..